Four Habits of Highly Effective Parents (click to comment)

My Mother once told me, “Sonny, if you don’t have answers, ask someone who does.” I was six months old at the time, so her advice has taken awhile to sink in. Here are five practical parenting tips I’ve gleaned from five smart friends:

1. Act your wage. Experts tell us that the leading cause of divorce is money trouble. Maybe that’s why my wife and I are happily married. We don’t have much. Larry Burkett told me his unique remedy for the government’s financial woes: “If I was President, I would hire a housewife with four children, living on $30,000 a year and put her in as the government budget director. She would straighten this mess out because she knows how to budget.” Larry believes two more Commandments should be pasted to every fridge: Thou shalt spend less than thou earnest. If thy credit cards outspend thee, cut them off.

2. Don’t always be right. Grammy Award-winning singer Steven Curtis Chapman believes that the five hardest words a man will ever say are, “I’m sorry. I was wrong.” He also believes the words are essential to a healthy home atmosphere. “I would like to come to the end of my life,” says Steven, “and have my wife say, ‘I saw him blow it, but his greatest desire was to live a life that honoured Jesus Christ.’ It would be nice if people remembered a song here and there, but that’s pretty insignificant compared to my desire to know Him.”

3. Squeeze the day. Tony Campolo told me, “Too many parents teach their children to pray, ‘If I should die before I wake,’” says Tony. “We should be praying that we’ll wake before we die—that we’ll make the most of each moment. The Bible says, ‘Redeem the time.’ Now that I’m old, I want to savour each moment. I want to laugh a lot and make others laugh. I want to enjoy my kids and play with my grandchildren. I want the time I spend with my wife to be rich.”

4. Invest in friendship. When I asked Gordon McDonald about moral failure in his life, he blamed only himself. But he did offer this insight: “What helps people survive and thrive is the accountability, support and rebuke that come from being in a tightly-knit group. I need men in my life who will look me square in the face and say, ‘Gordon, at this point you’re full of it.’ And if I had had those men 10 years ago, we wouldn’t be talking about failure today.”

What would you add to the list? (Next week: Four More Habits of Highly Effective Parents.)